On Spiders and How Much They Suck

We live in a basement suite. As such, we have a fairly deep stairwell that lead to our door. It’s cool (being concrete), usually dark and just the perfect amount of humid. The problem? Spiders like to live there. I hate spiders. I’m pretty sure I was born hating spiders, and now they’re trying to form a multi-species colony in my entry way. Fabulous.

Sure, we get lots of other things: mosquitoes, grasshoppers, flies, and this guy:


A little frog Shawn found chilling out in the corner when we went out to get rid of the nasty spider who kept insisting his GIANT web needed to be right in our doorway. Not cool, spider. Not cool. Every day, Shawn would knock it down, and every night the little bastard would put it back up again. Disgusting. Shawn finally relocated him to the shed. Hopefully he will continue his web building there.

Today, I finally saw, for the first time, the giant wolf spider who was building webs high up in the corner. I had never actually seen her before, but today she was just visible enough got me to get a good look. Why she? Shawn informed me she has a huge ass that’s just waiting to spew eggs all over the place. Perfect. She was also relocated to the shed, although I hope she decides our yard sucks and relocates altogether. I do not need a huge next of wolf spiders anywhere in my yard, thank you very much.

To top it all off, there is a little black jumping spider that resides on the corner of the house, right by the water tap. need to turn the hose on? Watch out for that disgusting little mong. Shawn would not let me spray him with the hose today. I was dismayed. He is crazy and seems to like spiders. I like that they keep the other insects down, I just don’t want them anywhere near me.

Hopefully, all the relocating to the shed area has solved the problem for now. I refuse to get close enough to deal with spiders on my own. I’m actually the girl who will trap one in an upside down glass until someone else can come take care of it (my cats are unreliable at capturing and killing non-flying pests). They can go anywhere they want, except my doorway, stairwell, house or collection of lawn ornaments.


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